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01 May

South Africa may have as many as 20 000 Internet addicts - if one applies a conservative 2% addiction probability rate to the more than one million Internet connections in the country.

These are people who experience a habitual compulsion to go online - an urge that is undermining their health, productivity and human relationships.

Those who 'commit adultery' with their hand and thereby cause semen to be spilled it is not enough that this is a great prohibition, but one who does so should sit in excommunication and about them it is said "Their hands are full of blood" and it is as if they have killed a person.“And you shall keep yourself from every evil thing”; From here R. Yair said that a person should not have [impure] thoughts in his heart, and thus bring himself to have impurity at night.”(Ketubot 46a)It is forbidden for a man who is not married to touch his private parts so that he doesn't come to have a sexual thought.

And he may not even touch anywhere under his belly button lest he have a sexual thought.

The assumption is derived from the incidence of other forms of addiction.

Cases are beginning to reach South African doctors’ and therapists’ consulting rooms in which an individual may spend up to 36 hours at a stretch surfing the Internet.

Recently, this back massager has been disappearing into my daughter’s room, where she says she uses it to massage her muscles.

He or she may spend the time bingeing on non-essential information, playing games on specialised sites, seeking out pornographic images and stories, or conducting virtual relationships with other users in chat rooms - often without sleep, food or any personal engagement with family and friends.“Internet addiction is very much a condition of the new age,” says Dr Gordon Isaacs, honorary professor of clinical social work at the University of Cape Town and a practising psychotherapist. But it may well come to that - in the same way that it took some years for post-traumatic stress disorder to achieve that status.”According to Peter Powis, clinical director of Stepping Stones, a private addiction clinic in Cape Town: “Society is in denial about a lot of addictions, but certainly about this one, which tends to involve some pretty high-functioning people.”Denial is most pronounced when it comes to people obsessed with sex on the Internet.

A cybersex addict typically feels habitually compelled to view pornography, to conduct “cyber affairs” or to engage in virtual sex with other Internet users in an Internet chat room or multi-user dungeon (known as a “MUD”).

I just discovered she is also experimenting with it on her genitals.

I don’t have any problem with her discovering her sexuality, but it seems awkward and inappropriate that she is using the instrument that I use. Last night she told me that she had used it on her genitals and that they were swollen and hurt.